No Rodin? No Moore? None of the great illustrators, potters, carvers, glass artists, fabric artists, leather workers? Let's start our own list.

Looking on the bright side, I suppose that The Telegraph's Top Fifty list gives us a good idea of what constitutes art in the 21st Century.

It seems to be a commodity that can be sold in a travel brochure, measured in dollars, and judged by celebrity rather than artistic quality.

This is useful information and explains why elephants are encouraged to paint and why bearded young men in Paris roll naked ladies covered in acrylics over canvas.

It tells me at last why we have seen hanging meat sold as sculpture, and why wrapping scenery in plastic is so applauded by the city fathers.

I am obviously out of touch with creativity as commerce.

All we need now is Air Miles included in the asking price.